The Museum of Microtransactions (the “Museum”) is a work of satire, commentary, and artistic expression. It does not offer, and you do not acquire, any good, service, security, financial instrument, investment, collectible, or thing of monetary or intrinsic value. Sums tendered to the Museum are contributions in support of an artistic work and are accepted as patronage, not as payment for anything. Your visitation constitutes your agreement to these Terms in their entirety.

Every contribution to the Museum is final upon tender. The Museum issues no refund, credit, reversal, or restoration of any contribution, in whole or in part, for any reason, at any time. This provision applies without exception, including to contributions made in error, in haste, in excess, or in a condition of subsequent regret.

Notwithstanding Article II, a visitor who believes their contribution to have been wrongly tendered may petition the Museum for the consideration — but not the issuance — of a refund. A petition is valid only if delivered by prepaid physical post, handwritten in permanent ink, to the Office of the Registrar:

A petition must enclose, in triplicate: (a) the petitioner’s full legal name; (b) the date and the hour, to the minute, at which the contribution was tendered; (c) a statement of grievance not exceeding one hundred words, sworn before a notary; (d) the original or a faithful transcription of these Terms; and (e) a stamped envelope bearing the petitioner’s own return address. Petitions transmitted by electronic means, or omitting any enclosure, are void and are not retained.

Valid petitions are considered by the Curator at the Curator’s sole, absolute, and unreviewable discretion, upon no fixed schedule and with no obligation of reply. Consideration is not a refund and confers no entitlement to one. The disposition of every petition remains governed by Article II.

Contributions are processed by third-party payment providers. Any dispute, chargeback, or reversal you initiate through such a provider is governed solely by that provider’s terms and procedures, over which the Museum exercises no control and assumes no responsibility. Nothing in these Terms limits, or purports to waive, any right you hold under applicable law that cannot lawfully be waived.

The Museum, and everything within it, is provided “as is” and “as available,” without warranty of any kind, whether express, implied, or statutory, including any implied warranty of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, title, or non-infringement. The Museum does not warrant that it will be available, uninterrupted, accurate, or free of error, nor that any exhibit, figure, ranking, or fact presented within it is fit for any purpose whatsoever.

To the fullest extent permitted by applicable law, the Museum, its operators, and its contributors shall not be liable for any indirect, incidental, special, consequential, or exemplary damages, nor for any loss of profits, data, goodwill, or standing, arising out of or relating to your visitation or contribution, under any theory of liability.

To the fullest extent permitted by applicable law, the total aggregate liability of the Museum for all claims arising out of or relating to these Terms or the Museum shall not exceed the total contributions you tendered to the Museum in the three months preceding the event giving rise to the claim, or five United States dollars, whichever is less.

Doubloons, catalogue values, predation grades, benefactor standings, titles, colours, and all other tokens, ornaments, and distinctions conferred by the Museum are devices of the work and have no monetary value. They are not currency, electronic money, securities, or property; they are not transferable, redeemable, or exchangeable for money or anything of value; and they may be adjusted, suspended, revoked, or discontinued at any time, without notice and without compensation. A benefactor’s standing may be reconsidered, revised, or removed by the Museum or at the sponsored request of another visitor.

You acknowledge that the Museum is a satirical work; that nothing within it is offered as, or should be relied upon as, financial, investment, legal, or other advice; that no representation of value, benefit, or advantage is made or intended; and that you tender any contribution with full knowledge of the foregoing and in the absence of any reliance to the contrary.

The Museum may display advertising and may link to or incorporate materials operated by third parties. The Museum does not endorse, and is not responsible for, any third-party content, product, or practice, and your dealings with any third party are solely between you and that third party.

You are responsible for any display name, title, or text you submit, and you warrant that you hold the rights to it and that it is not unlawful, infringing, or offensive. The Museum may decline, alter, or remove any submission, and may refuse or discontinue service to any visitor, at its discretion.

The Museum’s text, design, engravings, arrangement, and other original content are the property of the Museum or its licensors and are protected by law. The historical facts documented by the Museum are presented as commentary and criticism. You are granted no right in the Museum’s content except to view it for personal, non-commercial purposes.

You agree to indemnify and hold harmless the Museum and its operators from any claim, loss, liability, or expense (including reasonable legal fees) arising out of your visitation, your contributions, your submissions, or your breach of these Terms, to the fullest extent permitted by applicable law.

These Terms are governed by the laws of [GOVERNING JURISDICTION], without regard to its conflict-of-laws rules. [Any dispute shall be resolved exclusively in the courts of, or by binding arbitration seated in,] [VENUE]. [Class-action and representative claims are waived to the extent permitted by law.] Nothing in this Article deprives you of the protection of the mandatory provisions of the law of your place of residence.

The Museum’s handling of personal data, and its use of cookies and similar technologies, are described in its [Privacy Notice] and governed by your choices in the Museum’s consent controls. Your continued visitation is subject to those terms.

The Museum may amend these Terms at any time by posting the amended Terms within the Museum. Amendments take effect upon posting, and your continued visitation constitutes acceptance. The date of last revision appears at the head of this document.

If any provision of these Terms is held unenforceable, that provision shall be limited or severed to the minimum extent necessary, and the remaining provisions shall continue in full force. These Terms constitute the entire agreement between you and the Museum concerning their subject matter and supersede any prior understanding.

Correspondence with the Museum, other than refund petitions (which are governed exclusively by Article III), may be addressed to [CONTACT EMAIL]. Refund petitions sent by electronic means are void.